Five components of emotional intelligence


Speak but in a correct way to reduce stress


1. Don’t use phrases like „let’s talk quickly” or „let’s have a short conversation”

2. Describe things which will happen in the future in future tense not in present

3. Don’t use „I have to” or „I must” Instead, „I must go to Berlin tomorrow,” say, „I will go to Berlin tomorrow”

4. Use simple past instead past perfect especially for less nice situations.

5. If your mother says you are too generous don’t push back. Talk about her perception. It’s better to talk about why generosity is important and that you don’t like mother’s misery.

6. Don’t ask why e.g. Why do you like this picture? Say „What do you like in this picture?” Not „Why don’t you talk to me?” But „When do we want to talk?”

7. Don’t use negative statements. When you say „Don’t imagine a rabbit” or „This task is not difficult” as our brain will not handle “not”. It is better to say „It is not easy”. Not „I don’t want to be late” instead „I want to be on time”

8. Use full and short sentences. Our brain can handle only one picture per sentence.

9. In German try to use peaceful words and avoid phrases like „Ein Projekt in Angriff nehmen” or „in Visier” or „kriegsentscheidend”

10. Don’t say „I cannot”. It is better to say „I cannot do it YET”

Source: Die Welt Lehmann und B. Strohmaier